Today I'm making changes.  Well at least today I've got to the point of acknowledging a change that has been developing for a few months, and doing something about it.

But it's not easy!

Up to now, my focus has been to help mid-life women who are feeling stressed, exhausted and overwhelmed with menopause-related symptoms to take back control of their health and wellbeing so they can enjoy life again and embrace their future.  And I've been doing this through coaching and education services.

However I have been gradually developing a passion for doTerra essential oils, which are basically a different toolkit for achieving health and wellbeing.   They have made a huge difference to me, and I have decided that I want to focus my energies on sharing the message about how they can help with my clients too.

The thing is, I've been dabbling a bit with mentioning essential oils 'on the side'.  I've been nervous about saying too much as I didn't want to dilute my previous messages about how I could support my clients.  But today I decided to 'come out'.  It's been scary!

I have recorded a video to explain to my followers about what I'm doing.  There's only been positive feedback from that (so far!).

I've sent an email to my mailing list, offering them to unsubscribe if they're not interested.  There's been rather a deluge of 'unsubscribe' notifications.  It's not easy to see them come in, but if people aren't interested in my message, then it's time for me and them to let go.

Time will tell about whether it's the right move.  I definitely feel quite vulnerable now and unsure about whether I've done the right thing.  But I figured that if I don't try, I'll never know.

There's a great quote I have on my Vision Board - "You never cross the ocean unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore".  Let's hope I manage to reach the other side, as that will mean that other people are discover the amazing physical and emotional therapeutic benefits of essential oils, and loving them as much as I do.

Mary is a Director of the UK Health Coaches Association, a qualified Health Coach and a doTerra Wellness Advocate.  She runs a private Facebook group supporting women struggling with menopausal symptoms, and provides regular training and information sessions on Women's Health.  For more information see www.bloomwithmary.co.uk and for future events see www.facebook.com/bloomwithmary/events.

Now the clocks have gone back, it's hard to deny that winter is on its way.  I find this week particularly hard, with the nights drawing in and the feeling that it will be months before we get light evenings again.  It's also the time of year when coughs, colds and other lurgies are lurking, and it's easy to worry about falling prey to the latest bug doing the rounds.

However, over the years I have learnt that if I wallow in that feeling, it just perpetuates itself and makes me feel worse, so I know I have to build in strategies to change my emotional attitude (mindset) and also support my physical strength to not just make it through winter, but also enjoy it.

Before I share some of my top tips, have a think about how you feel, and whether you have strategies in place for making the most of the next few months.  What are you thinking?  What are you doing?  If you'd like some inspiration - read on!

These are my top 5 tips.  

1. Manage light.  I make getting outside in natural light - even if it's cold & grey - every day an absolute priority.  If I can get out in nature even better, but anything outside a building or car will do.  I consider 10-20 minutes a minimum, and if I can combine it with a walk, or bike ride, even better.  It might be walking along the High St popping in & out of shops, parking further away from my destination or catching up with a friend outside.  Natural light is a key part of regulating our circadian rhythms, which in turn drives every cell in the body.  Ideally we need about 10,000 lux for 20 minutes a day.  Download a lightmeter app to see how many you're getting!
2. Find things to look forward to​.  I always ensure I have some treats in my diary for the winter months.  Skiing is a love of mine, and I actually get excited when I know snow is coming!  For some people winter sunshine is a must.  It doesn't have to be a major holiday though - how about a catch-up with friends, a date in your diary to watch a promised film or box set.  Maybe time to learn a new skills or join a club you've been interested in.  Find something that excites you and get it in your diary.
3. Boost your immune system with essential oils.  This is a really important one to get through the winter with maximum energy and minimum colds, coughs and snuffles.  There's so much you can do to boost your immune system but I'd like to talk about an amazing 'toolkit' that I have started using really successfully over the last 18 months, which are doTerra* essential oils.  I use the Protective Blend (On Guard) every night on the soles of my feet; if I feel snuffly I use the Respiratory Blend (Air) by inhaling or rolling around my chest and throat; if it get a sore throat or start feeling like I'm going down with a cold, I use 'FLOOM' - a blend I make myself with Frankincense, Lemon, On Guard, Oregano and Melaleuca (tea tree).  1-2 drops of each in a capsule or applied topically with a carrier oil 2-5 times a day has amazing therapeutic properties, with oregano which is sometimes known as 'nature's antibiotic', lemon which is full of antixoidants and frankincense which is incredibly healing.  The beauty of essential oils is that if you use a brand like doTerra, they are made to be therapeutic so you get huge emotional and physical benefits, and they're so lovely with their amazing fragrance.  They can be used preventatively, and also are great when you just want to grab something to help in the moment.
   
4. Reframe your mind.  If you think winter is a miserable time of year, it's probably a self-fulfilling prophecy.  You could try a CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy - the coaching style in which I am qualified) approach whereby you identify the feeling e.g. 'winter is so awful I'll never make it through', and learn to re-frame your thoughts such as 'winter can be hard because I don't like the dark evenings, but it allows me to snuggle on the sofa and watch my favourite films guilt-free so it has its benefits'.  Acknowledging your struggles whilst creating a different perspective can be a powerful way of boosting your morale.  If you'd like help with this, do get in touch.
   
5. Eat the rainbow.  Ensuring your diet is packed with nutrients is especially important both for boosting your state of mind as well as strengthening your body against seasonal threats.  By eating a wide range of colourful fruit and vegetables, you will give your body the best chance of staying strong.  Think antioxidants, vitamins and minerals, which are all essential for wellbeing.  Personally I do take supplements, but more as an 'insurance' policy.  In winter I take extra vitamin D and all year round I take Omega 3's, as part of doTerra's* amazing Lifelong Vitality supplements set.
   

I hope these tips prove to be of use to you.  Do remember that when you make lifestyle changes, that you can't do them all at once.  Choose one things that most appeals to you and is realistic to fit in to your life at the moment.  Try it for a few days, a week maybe, then if it's working, you can add in something else.

I'd love to know your top tips for surviving winter.  Please do share yours.

*if you're interested in knowing more about doTerra essential oils, please do get in touch with me directly as you won't find them in the shops, which keeps their prices down.  At the time of writing this blog (28th October) there's an amazing offer - if you buy On Guard, you get Air free - available until Wednesday 30th.  Please email me mary@bloomwithmary.co.uk if you'd like to get these wonderful natural winter solutions in your home now!

Mary supports women who are feeling stressed, exhausted and overwhelmed to take back control of their health and wellbeing using natural solutions so they can enjoy life again and embrace their future.  See www.bloomwithmary.co.uk for more details.

Watch my interview with Sam from Midlife Makeover, who asked me for my top tips for feeling better during the perimenopause and menopause.  See what I said about the place of affirmations, gratitude and being in the flow!

As I was struggling to concentrate this morning, I thought it might be helpful to share some tips and advice on brain fog, memory and concentration problems, which are so common during perimenopause and menopause.

Brain fog is usually as a result of unbalanced hormones, typically thyroid*, oestrogen and/or cortistol.

If you're looking for a quick fix, then these might help:

• Drinking loads of water & reducing/avoiding caffeine & alcohol.  Are you getting 2 litres of water/herbal teas a day?  
  
• Go to bed early & get a longer sleep.  Poor sleep quality and not enough sleep can have a dramatic impact on our brain function.
  
• Use essential oils** for an instant boost - peppermint essential oil increases blood flow to the brain and helps improve concentration.  Rosemary is known for its memory-enhancing functions. I have a blend containing peppermint, rosemary, wild orange, bergamot and frankincense which I roll on my temples and back of my neck whenever I'm struggling to concentrate.

In the longer term, there are a number of key activities or strategies that can help:

• Manage your stress levels and stress response.  When our stress response is firing up our body is not worried about whether it can remember where we left the car keys.  The stress response is biologically designed to preserve life, so resources are diverted to life-preserving activities - your keys aren't one of them!  Breathing techniques, mindfulessness, meditation, can all help, but also simple activities like catching up with a friend, doing a hobby you love, connecting with nature or a 10 minute brisk walk can all help.
  
  
• Improve your gut health.  What's in your gut - your microbiome - is highly influential on brain function.  Did you know that our gut has a 'second brain', and there's something called the gut-brain connection, which can have a major impact on our thoughts, feelings, mood and cognitions? Are you eating probiotic-rich food regularly, such as natural live yogurt, kefir, sauerkraut, kombucha?  Are you including lots of different coloured veggies in your diet every day?  
  
  
• Reduce your toxic load.  Modern life is full of chemicals, and these can have a massive effect on all our biological functions, including brain function and hormonal balance.  Think about what you use on your face & body, chemicals in cleaning products, food or drink you consume that has been in contact with plastic.  Also consider reducing consumption of alcohol, sugar and some non-prescription medications that take up a lot of liver function, meaning that our body can't detoxify the nastier chemicals so effectively.

There's lots you can do, but it will be different for everyone, and to avoid becoming overwhelmed, start with one baby step, then gradually add other strategies.

If you are really struggling and know you would like to make some changes, and would value some personalised support, please do get in touch for a free, informal and confidential chat - you can book a date directly in to my diary here: https://www.bloomwithmary.co.uk/contact.html. 

​*Thyroid issues can be easily confused with menopausal symptoms.  They include difficulty regulating energy levels, weight problems, sensitivity to cold, mental sluggishness, mood issues, low immunity, perspiration issues, hair loss & throat dryness amongst others.  If you are concerned you should ask for a thyroid function test from a qualified medical professional.

**if you're considering using essential oils, use the best quality you can find, which should be guarantee pure therapeutic grade.  Also do check with your healthcare professional as even natural treatments can interfere with medication, although essential oils are generally considered extremely safe. 

People often ask what I do, as a Health Coach, to keep myself healthy, as I am post-menopausal and slimmer, fitter and healthier than I've ever been.

Starting my day well is a key part of this, so I thought I'd share the details of my morning routine.  I am post-menopausal, but I wish I had known about these things when I was suffering from hot flushes, night sweats and low mood during my perimenopausal years, as I now know that many of these nutrients can help substantially with supporting hormonal balance and therefore improving symptoms.

To save you writing notes, here is a summary of what I do:

• Glass of room temperature water first thing.
• Cup of lemon tea made with fresh lemon or lemon essential oil* with a drop of 'Smart & Sassy'* essential oil to wake me up and balance blood sugar levels so I don't feel hungry til I have my breakfast, which I tend to eat later as I regularly do Intermittent Fasting.  Lemon is also detoxifying as it supports the liver, so particularly good if you've over-indulged!
• A dash of Clary Calm essential oil* blends on the back of my neck, which supports hormone balance and smells gorgeous.
• Overnight oats containing organic rolled oats, Quinoa flakes, maca powder, ground flaxseed, berries or maybe half a grated apple, chia seeds, pumpkin seeds, kefir, nut milk and live natural yogurt (forgot to mention that in the video).  Sometimes I also sprinkle cinnamon on it.  This is packed with a huge range of nutrients that support all my bodily functions, fills me up and particularly supports my hormonal health now my body is making quite the amount of oestrogen and progesterone that it used to.  Ideally this needs making at least 1-2 hours in advance, and can be done the night before, or even in bulk several days in advance.
• Brazil nuts - for selenium, which is a key mineral we are often deficient in.
• Supplements - doTerra's Lifelong Vitality Pack containing all the Omega's, vitamins, minerals and other valuable nutrients to support my health & wellbeing.  If you want to try them, there's a full money-back guarantee if they don't make any difference to you.

Also in the picture is matcha tea, which I usually have at some point in the morning as my caffeine fix, and it's packed with antioxidants.  Green tea is good but as match is the whole leaf powdered it's even better.

*If you use any essential oils, especially internally, do ensure you use high quality, and if appropriate food grade oils.  I use doTerra because they are Guaranteed Pure Therapeutic Grade and I trust them.  That's also why I take doTerra supplements.

Mary supports women who are suffering from unwanted menopause-related symptoms, to make natural and lifestyle changes to reduce their symptoms and feel better.  For a free, informal chat, you can book a slot directly in to her diary here: www.bloomwithmary.co.uk/contact.  She also runs a safe and supportive Facebook group www.facebook.com/groups/bloomingmenopause for all women in their 30's, 40's and 50's who believe in the power of lifestyle and want to learn more about how to feel better through their midlife transition.

I love collaborating with other people supporting women going through the menopause, and Francesca, who is an Image Consultant and Stylist, wrote this great article which I want to share with you:

What should I wear during the menopause? 👗
Has menopause changed the way you dress? It has for many ladies that I know and I wanted to share my top tips what I have learnt! The hot days in the summer can be a real pain when going through menopause so I hope this can help a few ladies ☀️☀️
Style is an individual thing. You just have to figure out what works for you. Our body shape can change around the menopause so you may need to adapt a bit.
MY TIPS-
LOOSEN UP
If you’ve got a bit of middle-aged spread you might find that looser shapes look better. A slightly loose cotton shirt is fantastic in the summer and I think most women can wear that.
You want to feel comfortable and relaxed so fit is really important!
FABRIC CHOICE
Fabric is also important – go for natural fabrics such as cotton, linen, silk and cashmere, as they absorb moisture from the skin and help air to circulate around the body better. They’ll help you keep your cool during a flush and tend to hold their shape better.
LAYERS-
Master the art of layering
Anything you can waft – or remove – is good for a hot flush!
A scarf in the winter can be pulled off fast or wearing a skirt in the summer can help you feel cool and not so hot!
COMFY SHOES
Put your best foot forward! I don’t think anyone looks glamorous when their feet hurt. Nearly every designer brand now has a range of trainers. Not only are they comfortable but buying a new pair of fashionable trainers is another good way to look current. I also really like sliders, loafers and flats, which are great if you need to look a bit smarter.”
ADD FINAL TOUCHES
Don’t forget to accessorise to complete your outfit, but I wouldn’t necessarily wear a big statement necklace if you’re experiencing hot flushes.
You want to feel free and uncluttered and a heavy necklace can make you feel clammy and sweaty. Go for a pair of statement earrings instead.
Don’t stop at jewellery – why not wear a belt to add colour to your look and pull in looser tops. They are also easy to remove so if you do start to feel uncomfortable you can just whip it off!
Ultimately, wear what makes you look and feel good through the menopause (and cope with the hot flushes it brings).
The thing to remember is that you’re not dressing for your age, you’re dressing for your body shape!

Style doesn’t rely on age and the menopause is a great time to experiment and get creative to figure out what works best for you.
You can find out more about Francesca here: www.imageconsultantmaidenhead.co.uk and about my Menopause Coaching and Support services here: www.bloomwithmary.co.uk
#menopause #imageconsultant #personalstylist

In this short video, I explain when and what to expect with the menopause.  Many women think that it won't affect them until they are 50, but it's not usual to start affecting them in their 30's!  
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Please share this with your networks to spread the word - if women are informed about the menopause, then they can be prepared and do something about it.  It doesn't have to be a bad time of life! 

I'd also like men to understand so they can help support their partners - a difficult menopause affects us all!

If you think you might be going through the menopause and are suffering (or technically it's perimenopause until you no longer are having periods), then get help.  Consult your Doctor, but also consider how you can adjust your lifestyle to support your body, manage your hormones and feel better in yourself, not just for your current symptoms but also for the rest of your life!

www.bloomwithmary.co.uk
www.facebook.com/groups/bloomingmenopause

I believe practising mindfulness has helped reduce my menopausal symptoms - watch this short video for more information.
If this resonates with you, do connect with me - www.bloomwithmary.co.uk or my safe & supportive Facebook page www.facebook.com/groups/bloomingmenopause, or book a free mid-life action session directly in to my diary https://www.bloomwithmary.co.uk/work-with-me.html

Yesterday was a difficult day for me.  I had been on holiday the previous week, and due to a family illness, I had to come home early.  It was absolutely the right thing to do, and I didn't even think twice about it as I went to the airport in the early hours for the first flight home.  Fortunately things seem to have turned out fine, so after a few days of caring, and when I would have been back from holiday in any case, things returned to normal.

What I wasn't prepared for, was for my emotions to go haywire once I know it was going to be okay.  I slept badly, and spent yesterday feeling like a bit of an emotional wreck!

As it was my first day back at my desk, I had a to-do list as long as my arm, and lots of plans to write my newsletter, create themed posts for my Facebook group, catch up on emails etc.  Running my own business and with my Director role for the UK Health Coaches Association, I schedule my activities carefully  and I don't have much leeway in time, but I knew yesterday that I just wasn't going to get my full plan done.

So I decided to listen to my mind and body, and prioritise my self-care.  I wrote a short 'to-do' list with a couple priority actions, but dumped everything that wasn't crucial.  That way, when I got to the end of the day, I felt good that I ticked everything off, rather than bad that I hadn't done what I hoped I might have if I was firing on all cylinders.

I went for a walk in the fresh air, I was careful what I ate to ensure it was nutritious, albeit with a bit of chocolate thrown in(!), I diffused some calming and uplifting essential oils, including 'Motivate' and 'Peace' and I took time in the evening to do some relaxing and enjoyable activities.  Today I feel much better, and raring to go!

All this got me thinking about how we prioritise looking after ourselves.  I wonder what you think about the importance of your self-care and looking after you.  How far down is this on your 'to-do' list?  If it's not at the top, then remember that we can't be there for others if our cups our half-empty.  We need to be strong in ourselves to support our loved ones, and to have the energy to carry out our daily activities such as our jobs, managing the household, looking after family etc.  

I even wonder how much our lack of confidence in protecting our own self-care regime contributes to unwanted menopause-related symptoms?  

I know that a year or so ago, I would have felt guilty about taking time out for myself, and probably would have pushed myself to get more done yesterday, and feeling a failure that I hadn't done so.  Part of my journey learning to be a Health Coach for others, has also been about applying my learning and principles to myself. 

​So today I urge you to put your self-care higher on your list without feeling guilty.  In your mid-life years you deserve to look after yourself, and I believe it will help reduce unwanted menopause-related symptoms.  If that's too hard to swallow, think of it as an investment in to supporting your loved ones around you.  Be their rock!

Mary helps mid-life women who are feeling stressed, exhausted and overwhelmed with menopause-related symptoms to make lifestyle changes to take back control of their health and wellbeing so they can enjoy life again and embrace their future.  She runs a supportive Facebook group 'Blooming Menopause', offers free essential oil consultations and Mid-Life Action Sessions as well as running coaching programmes including 'Managing Hot Flushes Naturally'.  Have a look at www.bloomwithmary.co.uk for further information.